Monday 28 April 2008
Sunday 27 April 2008
Wedding Blues
Last Friday we attended Dugan & Det's wedding reception. Dugan is my landlord in his 60s and Det is his partner from Laos who is in his 20s.
First was of course the whole age difference and the ethnicity of both, which was already highly debatable and controversial! Then the dinner was held in a local Thai restaurant / take away place at the end of my road. There were about 30 of us, they laid a long table and it was a Thai buffet. It was plastic plates and cutlery with paper table mats. Great Thai food though. Wine was alright, the table flower arrangements were done by Dugan's 95 years old mother (bless her!) and we were served Sainsbury chocolate cake as dessert.
It was all very unusual and 'unique' should I say, but the most bizarre of all were Dugan's friends! All around Dugan's age with Asian boyfriends (cant really tell where they're from but reckoned all from the same village, they all look the same).
Then a few friends stood up and said a few words, one was drunk and started telling everyone how he 'match made' Dugan & Det in Laos, how they met in a bar where Det was a Bartender ('Great Cocktail Maker' according to his friend), I've to pinch Daniel to stop him from shouting out a comment! And the whole night we keep getting stories from their friends on how both of them met and their last 2 years 'journey', the whole traditional ceremony held back in Laos by Det's parents and Dugan paid for the whole thing, now Dugan is applying Det a Visa and they are travelling around Europe (Det's preference) and Det will be allowed to work as well... you all know where this is going and now Daniel have to pinch me from saying something rude!
It was a very bizarre experience but hey who am I to judge?! Except I worked my butt off and paid my dues and tax while living here in UK, while one village youngster just walked in and got everything served up on a silver platter (well paper plate to be fair)! I'm not bitter or sour at all really... I just wished they are both happy and true to each other... wish them well.
First was of course the whole age difference and the ethnicity of both, which was already highly debatable and controversial! Then the dinner was held in a local Thai restaurant / take away place at the end of my road. There were about 30 of us, they laid a long table and it was a Thai buffet. It was plastic plates and cutlery with paper table mats. Great Thai food though. Wine was alright, the table flower arrangements were done by Dugan's 95 years old mother (bless her!) and we were served Sainsbury chocolate cake as dessert.
It was all very unusual and 'unique' should I say, but the most bizarre of all were Dugan's friends! All around Dugan's age with Asian boyfriends (cant really tell where they're from but reckoned all from the same village, they all look the same).
Then a few friends stood up and said a few words, one was drunk and started telling everyone how he 'match made' Dugan & Det in Laos, how they met in a bar where Det was a Bartender ('Great Cocktail Maker' according to his friend), I've to pinch Daniel to stop him from shouting out a comment! And the whole night we keep getting stories from their friends on how both of them met and their last 2 years 'journey', the whole traditional ceremony held back in Laos by Det's parents and Dugan paid for the whole thing, now Dugan is applying Det a Visa and they are travelling around Europe (Det's preference) and Det will be allowed to work as well... you all know where this is going and now Daniel have to pinch me from saying something rude!
It was a very bizarre experience but hey who am I to judge?! Except I worked my butt off and paid my dues and tax while living here in UK, while one village youngster just walked in and got everything served up on a silver platter (well paper plate to be fair)! I'm not bitter or sour at all really... I just wished they are both happy and true to each other... wish them well.
Saturday 26 April 2008
Biker Chick
This is probably the third time in my whole life that I'm a pillion on a bike. The very first time I was 8 years old and the second when I was 20, both times scared the hell out of me. I'm not even a capable cyclist to start off with!D has been going on about getting me on his bike and this Saturday morning I was given a helmet and suggested we ride down to Brighton for the weekend as we are meeting his sister and brother-in-law for dinner.
At 100 mph, it was an accelerating and fantastic experience. Every time when D picked up speed, I can feel my heart pushing to the end of my throat. All I can do was to hold on for my dear life and hopefully try not to hold too tight and close to D. I've to say D was very careful and thoughtful.
An hour and a half later, we reached our destination. Well deserved break. I've to say... butt and thigh aches and helmet hair aside, it's definitely a positive start.
This also marked my 100th blog entry! Thank you all for reading!
Thursday 24 April 2008
Small Change
A very profound production. A story set in Cardiff in the 1950s. Two pairs of mothers and sons. Neighbours, working class, so poor... 'So poor that you have to stay quiet when the rent man knocks on the door.' Controlling and protective mothers. Rebellious and obligated sons. Two sets of good friends. The mothers and the sons.
Two mothers. Both haunted by their own secrets, regrets, hardships, chores, duties, social expectations, anger, repressions, guilt, reservations, oppressions, resentments, money, remorse, self pity, religion, families, husbands, sons. Lots of What Ifs? Found refuge in each other's arms. Found comfort and escapism.
Two sons. Both haunted by their friendship, dependence, family ties, obligations, pressure to conform, religion, guilt, resentments, unfulfilled lives, anger, admiration, desires, Love. Lots of What Ifs? Found joy in each other's arms and lips. Found hope. Found fear and denial.
Lives intertwines. Moving back and forth. Different eyes saw different perspectives and different understanding. None able to communicate. Time past. People change. Death. Hope found and lost... came regrets.
Sons becoming their mothers... Small change.
Two mothers. Both haunted by their own secrets, regrets, hardships, chores, duties, social expectations, anger, repressions, guilt, reservations, oppressions, resentments, money, remorse, self pity, religion, families, husbands, sons. Lots of What Ifs? Found refuge in each other's arms. Found comfort and escapism.
Two sons. Both haunted by their friendship, dependence, family ties, obligations, pressure to conform, religion, guilt, resentments, unfulfilled lives, anger, admiration, desires, Love. Lots of What Ifs? Found joy in each other's arms and lips. Found hope. Found fear and denial.
Lives intertwines. Moving back and forth. Different eyes saw different perspectives and different understanding. None able to communicate. Time past. People change. Death. Hope found and lost... came regrets.
Sons becoming their mothers... Small change.
Monday 14 April 2008
Dummy Guide To Weddings 2
As mentioned before, the wedding was held up North of England. About 30 mins train journey from Newcastle and 4.5 hours from London.
As part of the wedding party, we stayed in this really nice hotel / pub in a small village near the wedding venue. Nice decor and great atmosphere pub. As D and I are both used to our hotels whenever we travelled and for work, I've to say the place was rather pleasant and with a hint of rustic chic.
Just before leaving for the wedding, D decided to leave the chunky room key with the reception and to pick it up when we were back from the party. It made total sense to me.
Had a blast at the wedding party and came back to the hotel around 2am. Got off the taxi and stood right in front of the hotel. The whole place was shut. No lights, we knocked and not a single soul in the pub. By then we were standing in the middle of this village, dead quiet, FREEZING cold and running around the hotel ground trying to find our way into the hotel. Had too much to drink didn't help as well.
Looking up to our bedroom, which was right above the main entrance of the hotel on the first floor, one of our windows were actually left half opened by me before we left the room.
Without any hesitation, we pulled a wooden table against the entrance wall. I climbed on top of it, both hands on the edge of the roof and got D to push me up while I climb on top of the roof entrance (Thanks to all the low wall climbing skills in the army!). Still in my suit of course and feeling the great effect of alcohol, I balanced myself on the pitch roof, lift the window opened and threw myself into our bedroom.
By then we were pissing ourselves laughing and were trying not to wake the whole village up. In the end, managed to open the emergency exit from the back of the building and got D in.
Lesson number 2. When in a country hotel in the middle of no where, do not expect the same level of service of a city hotel. Even if you have to carry the chunky room key around, to avoid being locked out of the hotel, do it!
As part of the wedding party, we stayed in this really nice hotel / pub in a small village near the wedding venue. Nice decor and great atmosphere pub. As D and I are both used to our hotels whenever we travelled and for work, I've to say the place was rather pleasant and with a hint of rustic chic.
Just before leaving for the wedding, D decided to leave the chunky room key with the reception and to pick it up when we were back from the party. It made total sense to me.
Had a blast at the wedding party and came back to the hotel around 2am. Got off the taxi and stood right in front of the hotel. The whole place was shut. No lights, we knocked and not a single soul in the pub. By then we were standing in the middle of this village, dead quiet, FREEZING cold and running around the hotel ground trying to find our way into the hotel. Had too much to drink didn't help as well.
Looking up to our bedroom, which was right above the main entrance of the hotel on the first floor, one of our windows were actually left half opened by me before we left the room.
Without any hesitation, we pulled a wooden table against the entrance wall. I climbed on top of it, both hands on the edge of the roof and got D to push me up while I climb on top of the roof entrance (Thanks to all the low wall climbing skills in the army!). Still in my suit of course and feeling the great effect of alcohol, I balanced myself on the pitch roof, lift the window opened and threw myself into our bedroom.
By then we were pissing ourselves laughing and were trying not to wake the whole village up. In the end, managed to open the emergency exit from the back of the building and got D in.
Lesson number 2. When in a country hotel in the middle of no where, do not expect the same level of service of a city hotel. Even if you have to carry the chunky room key around, to avoid being locked out of the hotel, do it!
Sunday 13 April 2008
Dummy Guide To Weddings
Attended Jan & Mike's wedding last weekend. They are friends of D and have met with them for dinner months before their wedding.
Wedding was held up north of England in a country house with massive ground in the middle of no where. Picturesque setting and beautiful weather... freezing cold but everyone was happy and warm.
The bride and groom are both very cheerful, active and fun couple, and throughout the wedding you catches glimpses of their personalities and sense of humour being injected on this special day.
When it came to the exchanging of vows, both of them wrote their own. When Jan started reading hers, first we heard the voice cracked, then soft sobs and by then I could not control myself any more. I know it's pathetic but I was so touched by the amount of feelings and emotions both genuine and pure, opened and expressed in front of everyone, vowed to Love each other till the end of day with no expectations and holding back. To know Jan as a bubbly person before made it even more meaningful and special.
One thing I've learned this time... I will always bring tissues to all my future weddings from now on!
Wedding was held up north of England in a country house with massive ground in the middle of no where. Picturesque setting and beautiful weather... freezing cold but everyone was happy and warm.
The bride and groom are both very cheerful, active and fun couple, and throughout the wedding you catches glimpses of their personalities and sense of humour being injected on this special day.
When it came to the exchanging of vows, both of them wrote their own. When Jan started reading hers, first we heard the voice cracked, then soft sobs and by then I could not control myself any more. I know it's pathetic but I was so touched by the amount of feelings and emotions both genuine and pure, opened and expressed in front of everyone, vowed to Love each other till the end of day with no expectations and holding back. To know Jan as a bubbly person before made it even more meaningful and special.
One thing I've learned this time... I will always bring tissues to all my future weddings from now on!
Wishing Jan & Mike all the Love, happiness and bliss together.
Monday 7 April 2008
Solos
Went to see the Singapore made movie at the London Gay & Lesbian Film Festival recently.
The film was apparently requested by the local censors to have at least 3 cuts, hence the makers have decided not to show the film in Singapore at all.
I've to say the film was beautifully made. There was no dialogue in the whole movie, so it was up to the actors to convey the story through body language and facial expression... I also see it as a form of personal interpretation for the audience, relating their own experiences and understanding to the movie and the three actors (the Mother, the son and his lover who was his teacher). The most poignant image was when the 3 actors all sat together for dinner and it was just plain silence for a good ten minutes... something I'm quite accustomed to when growing up.
Throughout the movie there was sound, disruptive noises, sound designed to tell the story and to eject thoughts and emotions. The crescendo in the end.
The cinematography, the colours or the lack of it (was in black and white in most part of the movie) but also using colours to inject story line and message was just as powerful in the end.
The explicit scenes aside, it took a silent movie to make people realise how dumb we are in our lives, the lack of openness, the lack of discussion and conversation, the lack of expression, the lack of change, and the lack of freedom.
The film was apparently requested by the local censors to have at least 3 cuts, hence the makers have decided not to show the film in Singapore at all.
I've to say the film was beautifully made. There was no dialogue in the whole movie, so it was up to the actors to convey the story through body language and facial expression... I also see it as a form of personal interpretation for the audience, relating their own experiences and understanding to the movie and the three actors (the Mother, the son and his lover who was his teacher). The most poignant image was when the 3 actors all sat together for dinner and it was just plain silence for a good ten minutes... something I'm quite accustomed to when growing up.
Throughout the movie there was sound, disruptive noises, sound designed to tell the story and to eject thoughts and emotions. The crescendo in the end.
The cinematography, the colours or the lack of it (was in black and white in most part of the movie) but also using colours to inject story line and message was just as powerful in the end.
The explicit scenes aside, it took a silent movie to make people realise how dumb we are in our lives, the lack of openness, the lack of discussion and conversation, the lack of expression, the lack of change, and the lack of freedom.
At the end, the director and actor (the son) appeared on stage for Questions & Answers... Can't help but feel proud for his vision and determination. Though still some way to go before meeting international standards, but nevertheless a strong and daring message.
Sunday 6 April 2008
Smile
Simple things make me smile... bright sunny wintery mornings, seeing D, favourite songs playing in my iPod, D's texts messages, time spent with friends, time with D, a good book, TV ads, bright sunny spring evenings, cleaning, ironing and cooking to music, great theatre and movies, lazy weekend mornings with hot breakfast on my sofa, waking up to D, productive and effective work week, reading 3 different sets of Sunday morning papers with D and falling asleep after, making floral arrangements...
A friend's recent pictures on Facebook of his life in other part of the World made me smile too. Just knowing that he is doing fine, most importantly being himself and being happy. It's been too long and you deserve every happiness in your Life. Keep on smiling and keep on living.
A friend's recent pictures on Facebook of his life in other part of the World made me smile too. Just knowing that he is doing fine, most importantly being himself and being happy. It's been too long and you deserve every happiness in your Life. Keep on smiling and keep on living.
Since The Last Time I Wrote...
In the midst of all these craziness and news in the UK... young girl missing for 3 weeks then found in a family home, famous couple divorce case made public, kids getting gunned down by gangs, getting on the property ladder seems like an urban myth... and the continuous turmoil going on in the World... Burma and Tibet.
Getting on day by day with endless deadlines, work meetings one after another, interviews after interviews, entertaining clients in the evenings, searching from one job to another, always looking at pushing oneself with new challenges, earn a better living, no exercise for the last three weeks, ... when weekend comes, friends & endless social evenings.
So much going on.
Very often one is only trying to lead a peaceful Life... a good Life surrounded by his love ones... make a living and lead a decent Life... to be happy and content with what he does, with his Life and hopefully be a good person to all around him.
What's next? When do one stop? What and how one can make a difference? Where can one find refuge? What is this World becoming into?
Big questions. But no answers.
Getting on day by day with endless deadlines, work meetings one after another, interviews after interviews, entertaining clients in the evenings, searching from one job to another, always looking at pushing oneself with new challenges, earn a better living, no exercise for the last three weeks, ... when weekend comes, friends & endless social evenings.
So much going on.
Very often one is only trying to lead a peaceful Life... a good Life surrounded by his love ones... make a living and lead a decent Life... to be happy and content with what he does, with his Life and hopefully be a good person to all around him.
What's next? When do one stop? What and how one can make a difference? Where can one find refuge? What is this World becoming into?
Big questions. But no answers.
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