We've finally came to the point for us to have THE discussion!
Yes, S and I. THE discussion on where and how are we moving forward. THE amicable discussion that every couples have in a matter of time, and ours came after 4 blocks of weekend time together. I supposed our distance apart heightens the need for this discussion sooner than later.
It was all very genuine and intense to say the least. A lot of opening up, which I was so touched by his words and ways. In this short period of time, the impact that we have on each other, and in this short period of time, the feelings we can have for someone... somehow surprises me.
I can go on and on about the distance. I can go on and on about the pressure of when we see each other and when we are not together. I can go on and on of the joy and sadness when we see each other and when one has to leave. I can also go on and on about the stress of planning and putting a date in the diary of when we will see each other again even before we're apart.
Anyone who knows me should know better. The above are of course not ideal! Not in my definition of a relationship but with age comes maturity, and with my work life here in London, long distance relationship might just work for me. PROVIDED if he's the right one and gives me the right reasons to do so. With modern communication technology, modern transportation systems, and open communication between us, things might just work out! I am not saying this should be permanent! LDR should always be temporary and so long as we both know that and are willing to work towards a common goal, and throw in a bit of grown person's trust, go with the flow when we see each other and not having a fixed and rush itinerary, things might just work!
S has picked up the vibe. I've said no. I've told him that it's not going to be easy and not possible.
Why? Of course I've banked only on the 'Distance' trump card! S is great guy! He ticked most of the boxes! He's a very sweet and innocent guy too, hence I've to be gentle with him...
There is just one thing... It's a shame really. Just one tiny little detail but no doubt an important one. We will remain friends and I can see that we will be very good friends for a long long time. And that suits me just fine.
Thank you S for being yourself and letting me be myself. All the words you've said will always remain in my heart, and I wish the same for you too.
Moving onwards and forwards. Who's next?!
